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Friday, June 6, 2014

Abundant Awareness.

So I am the worst at blogging lately! Sorry everyone! I promise I'll be better! I've been super busy lately, I took 7 summer credits of upper division classes and finished them in two weeks because I will be working this summer as a health counselor for EFY. Which leads me into today's post. Last week I had the amazing opportunity to pick up an extra week working at Especially For Youth. This was completely unplanned for me because I still had 17+ papers to write, along with a midterm and a final, but someone really needed that week covered so I decided to take it for them.
Honestly, going into that week was absolutely terrifying. I have never worked during the summer for EFY, let alone as a health counselor (rumored to be one of the toughest jobs)! And let me tell you...I have never worked harder in my life than I do working as a health counselor. The hours are long, seriously it is a 24/7hr. job because we are expected to be there Sunday thru Saturday and are on call at all hours during the day and night. Not only did each day leave my physically drained but also mentally drained. I was literally running all around campus (sprinting at one point) with a 10lb bag full of medical supplies all week. I knew this job might be tough but coming into it I had no idea that this is what was going to be expected of me. There were points that I was thinking "oh goodness this is going to be a long summer." With that being said, I wouldn't change any of it for the world. Here's why: Throughout the week the youth is involved in a lot of spiritual activities and because of health counselor duties I wasn't really able to sit in on really any of it. This bummed me out because I figured that accepting this job I'd be able to sit in on classes and grow spiritually, but my responsibilities hadn't exactly allowed it. I decided that I was going to make the best of my week regardless of whatever situation I was in and as soon as I changed my mindset numerous spiritual experiences poured in. Each day I was able to find something spiritual that had happened. For example, I was taking care of a girl and was able to talk with her a little and hear her testimony, as I was talking to her I realized it wasn't me, it was the spirit speaking through me to her. I've only ever had one other experience with this and it is so amazing. There are no words to explain it, it helps me understand what it's like to be a modern-day missionary and for that I am beyond grateful. Something else that happened was me losing my personal car keys. I was going to run home real quick to grab my textbook and realized the keys to my apartment and car were nowhere to be found. I literally searched everywhere, no joke, I even checked the fridge. I was freaking out and calling my mom didn't exactly help. Panicking, I went to our site office (where we have daily meetings, etc.) and a member of my team Tanner realized I was upset, he asked if I was okay and of course that's the question that ALWAYS makes me cry. He gave me a hug and without even hesitating everyone on my team was helping me look. I had already said a prayer and was able to calm down thanks to my incredible team. I made the choice to not worry about it and accept the consequences of paying for new ones if I had to. The next morning the lady in charge of cleaning the building gave a pair of car keys to a member on my team and guess who's keys they were?! Mine! The biggest thing that happened was my realization that our Heavenly Father is well aware of my situation and feelings. See, I was writing in my journal one night and was completely overwhelmed with just how aware Heavenly Father is of me and my life. As I was writing I realized that I am working this job for a reason. And although it's hard, it has reminded me of why I am so passionate about working in the healthcare field. Lately I have completely lost hope of being able to work in the medical field and have even gone as far as changing my major (to something that is completely uninteresting to me) but being here, working this job has been such a blessing because it helped remind me of my passion. My passion to become a registered nurse. It helped my to know that our Heavenly Father is aware of my lost hope, my actual desires and the prayers I thought had gone unheard. He is aware of the fact that I am not in nursing school yet and the thought of having to give that up has absolutely crushed me. He is aware. As much as you may think he isn't, I promise he is fully aware and knows what you are going through. It can sometimes feel like he isn't there and he hasn't heard your pleading prayers, but he has. You may not fully recognize his presence in your daily life, but I promise if you look and listen, you will find his hand in your daily blessings and tender mercies. Not always will it be apparent, it might be something simple and small. But that something simple and small can make the biggest impact on your life. Depend on your faith, allow Heavenly Father to carry you through your trials. I know it can be something that is extremely hard to do but in order for him to help you, you've got to be willing to let him. It takes patience and a lot of trust, but as you develop these things within your Heavenly Father you will grow to know that he is aware. Try it. That's all it takes, trying and a little bit of effort to listen and you will see that he is aware. His awareness is abundant.


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